Hey, family! Welcome back to Vibe Check. This conversation is a tender one—and perhaps a bold one. We’re digging into something that’s become all too common in spiritual and wellness spaces: spiritual bypassing. You’ve probably felt it before—the unspoken rule that you’re only welcome if you’re glowing with positivity, smiling through the pain, or keeping your grief neatly tucked away. But is that true healing? Is that what it means to be “spiritual?” (Spoiler alert: no, it’s not.) This video is a heartfelt offering to anyone who’s ever been made to feel like their sadness was too heavy, their grief too loud, their anger too disruptive, etc. We’re naming the real cost of toxic positivity, unpacking how “good vibes only” and “high vibes only” culture can become a form of emotional repression in wellness, and we’re reclaiming the truth: healing through our more complicated emotions is not a failure. It’s sacred, powerful, and necessary. If you’ve ever been in a space that celebrated “love and light" but silenced your rage and sorrow, if you’ve ever been told your truth was “too much,” if you’ve questioned your place in spiritual communities, if you’re seeking spaces rooted in authentic healing and collective care...you’re deeply felt, and you’re in the right place. *What we’re exploring:* • The roots (and rise) of “good vibes only” in wellness culture • Why spiritual gaslighting is so harmful, especially for folks at the margins • The sacredness of rage, grief, and “messy” emotions • How decolonizing wellness means honoring the full spectrum of our feelings • The nervous system impact of repressing our truth • What it looks like to create healing spaces that honor complexity *Let’s talk in the comments!:* 💭 What’s a moment when you felt pressure to be “positive” even though you were hurting? 💭 Have you ever been in a wellness space that didn’t feel safe for your full self? 💭 If we redefined “high vibes” as truth and presence—not forced positivity—what would that look like in your life right now? If this resonated and you're craving spaces that honor the whole you, subscribe and stay a while. This channel is one that honors the full spectrum of truth in spirituality. *Timestamps:* 00:00 - Intro: What We're Exploring 01:11 - When “Just Stay Positive” Doesn’t Help 02:31 - Unpacking the Roots of “Good Vibes Only” 05:19 - Why This Harms Marginalized Folks Especially 07:59 - Personal Story: When My Truth Didn’t Feel Welcome 10:53 - The Hidden Costs of Emotional Repression 12:39 - What Our Ancestors Knew About Grief, Pain, & Healing 14:18 - Reframing “High Vibes” 15:36 - A Moment of Breath: You’re Allowed to Feel It All *Music:* Mad Keys — https://audiio.com/mad-keys *Resources mentioned in this video:* Why Being Dysregulated Might Be EXACTLY What You Need | A Radical Approach to Healing (Vibe Check) — https://youtu.be/njuBbc2vGfc *Work with me 1:1:* http://www.srlwellbeing.com/ *Connect with me on Instagram:* http://www.instagram.com/stephrlong and http://www.instagram.com/srlwellbeing #collectivehealing #decolonizingwellness #goodvibesonly #spiritualbypassing #toxicpositivity _____ *About Vibe Check:* Vibe Check was born from my work at Refinery29’s Unbothered, where I launched the Vibe Check vertical in February 2022 as a space for candid discussions on identity, wellness, and personal journeys. This YouTube series continues that tradition as I share insights from my own path—covering wellness, self-care, and embracing vulnerability. I reflect on personal stories, trending topics, lessons I’m integrating, and how I’m aligning with my true self. It’s a space to explore what it means to grow, heal, and become. In Vibe Check, I also decolonize what we’ve been conditioned to believe wellness is. I challenge the idea that wellness is something you buy or that it looks the same for everyone. The mainstream wellness industry often commodifies health, selling products as the key to feeling better. I push back on the one-size-fits-all mental health model, where diagnoses overshadow individual nuances. I explore identity’s intersections—race, gender, culture—and how they shape our healing. While I guide others as a certified wellness coach, meditation facilitator, and Ayurvedic educator, here in Vibe Check, I step out of those roles. It’s just me, having raw, real conversations about growth, liberation, and the human experience—the kind of chats you'd have with a friend about wellness, becoming, and everything in between. *Vibe Check on Substack:* http://stephrlong.substack.com/
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